Day 234: With So Many Commitments, You Spread Yourself Too Thin – Making You Ineffective.

One of the most difficult thing to do is  confidently saying NO to a request made by a close friend, workmate or a family member. I have found myself having a hard time saying  no  to my daughter. It is a huge balancing act; but in itself, I am learning how to say no most often.

Do you experience difficulties saying no?  Saying yes gives an impression that you are a nice person. Humans are social beings and  are driven to maintain  relationships and so it can be difficult to let people down by saying no, even if it is possibly  the right thing for you to do. I have grown up knowing that saying NO is being rude and thus unacceptable. I have now understood the need to keep my boundaries by saying no.

 Now I have learnt a fact that you can not be productive and effective if you take on too many commitments. Understand you are the Captain of your life, not what people think of you. With so many commitments, you spread yourself too thin which will make you  unable to get anything done, or perform the tasks poorly or fail to meet the deadline. It is detrimental when you fail to honor demands as a result of having said yes, your reputation is at stake.

What is  hard about saying no? Saying no can hurt, it can cause anger or be a disappointment to the other person, we all do not want that. Saying no to a person you plan to work with in the future, who you want to maintain a good relationship with can be a tricky affair because you want this person in the future.

Saying no does not mean that you are being rude, selfish,inconsiderate or unkind. These are all limiting beliefs that make it hard to say no to something that is unfavorable. When you do not understand your values, you end up following and doing what everybody else want. If someone cross your boundaries, you should be able to say no.

Myself, I had to learn how to say no. I had to learn to say no without being awkward, compromising relationships  or becoming guilty.

So, what are you going to say no to? Say no to things that do not improve your life, things that do not improve your family and things that do not increase your paycheck.

Share with me on the comment section below how being unable to say no has affected you, if indeed it has. Do you have difficulties saying no to your friends or family members?

Photo by cottonbro on

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